Satire: The 'Doing More AI Than You' CTO Who Rebrands Failure as Learning Velocity

DavidLinthicum · x · 2026-09-24

A satirical takedown of the enterprise 'I'm Doing More AI Than You Are' CTO: they measure success in tokens burned per day and agent swarms per sprint rather than revenue, productivity, or customer value. The reality, the author says: 90% of AI projects are stalled, abandoned, or hallucinating — agent swarms creating 9,000 Jira tickets, AI finance assistants categorizing cloud spend as office snacks — while the core executive skill is "rebranding failure as learning velocity." Failed pilots become 'market signal discovery,' blown budgets become 'strategic capability investment,' and the board loves it. Real AI leadership, the post argues, shows up in business outcomes, not keynote slides.

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